how I met her??

she was borned on 20th january 1995// sie wurde am zwanzigsten januar 1995 geboren.

she has big round eyes, which are wonderful// sie hat knopfaugen, die sehr wunderschoen aussehen.

her body is slender and she is not so tall, which makes her so cute// ihre koerper ist schlank und sie ist klein, das macht ihr sehr suess.

yah kurang lebih bgtu deh gambaran tu cewe,, tipe2 cwe yang laku keras di pasaran. gw inget, gw pertama kali knal dy pas gw sma 3, pas itu dy masih smp 2. gw sebenernya awalnya gag tau dy, yg bkin gw tertarik mw kenalan ma dy, karena perbincangan yg terjadi d depan kelas pas lagi kerja kelompok.

temen1: sapa ya adek kelas kita yg cantik?

gw: mana gw tau, gw pan jarang merhatiin

temen2: eh, temen1, lo sd d sanur kaan, lo inget sii putri gaa?

temen1: yg 4 angkatan d bawah kita?

temen3: yg kakaknya skrg kls x kaaan?

temen2: iye, yg ituu, itu cakep kaan? dari kecill jg uda cakep

gw: yg mana sii? g pernah liad gw

temeen2: yakin lo? dy tu cakep bgd looh, dr kecil uda kliatan cakepnyaa

temen1: klo mnurut gw siih, matanya kegedeann

temen3: klo mnurut gw, dy ckep kook

gw: uda pnya cwoo dy?

temen2: harusnya si udah, knapa? maao lo?

gw: kalo emg sgtu cakepnya, knpaa ga?

setelah perbincangan inii, gw lgsg search dy d fb, n lgsg gw add. klo gw liad2 siih emg cakep, tp yg jadi masalahnya,, gw kenal ma cwonyaa.

hbs di accept, gw wall2an ma dyee, trus kita lanjut cett di msn.

g krasa gw uda megang no dy, trus kita sering telponan smpe subuh.

trus kita jg smpet jalann brg. tapi emg bangkai busuk mw disimpen gmn jg, ttp kecium baunyaa

akhirnya cwonya tauu klo dy menduaa. n tu cwo mulai mencari2 siapa kaum adam yang bermain curang ituu. irgendwie, he found out, that this man was me. tp cwonya ini gag pernah ngomong lgsung k gw, dy cm brani ngeluh k cwenyaa.

sampai suatu harii, she's gone. gw ga bisa contact dy sama skali, klo pun bisa, gw bisa liad klo dy mulai membuat jarak dgn gw. gw ngerti apa yg dy mau.

besoknya gw nungguin dy d dpn pntu les dy, smbil membakar MBBM, bgtu lamaa rasanyaa, gw cm mw tauu aja apa yg terjadii., n gw mau mencurahkan perasaan gw.

bgtu dy kluar, gw malah g bsa manggil dy, mulut gw kelu, n gw ngerasa klo gw n dy tu jauuh bgd. besoknya gw nunggu lg d tmpat yg sama, tp hal yg sama terulang lagiii.

sampe suatu saat cwonya itu blg k gw

cwonye: waktu itu gw tnya k dy, kamu knal bernard ga?

putri: gag kok, ak gag kenal dy

gw: heeh? yg bner tuu?

cwonye: iye bneran

klanjutannya gw sensor, karenaa mles gw ngetiknyaa

sekarang, pas gw uda di jerman, dy kembali lagi k hidup gw.

n yg pasti, uda lebih dewasa, cantik, n dgn status : in a relationship with .....

titik2nya silakan diisi sendirii yaa.

kita ketemu cm d dunia maya, sama seperti cara kita knalan. tapi ntah knapa, gw jd pgn liad dy in person, gmn dy skrg, apakah dy masih kecil kyk dulu atau gag, dll.

tapi yg gw heran, knapa gw slalu pnya ksempatan bwt ngobrol ma dy cma pada saat dy pny cwo, knapa?

pdahal skrg gw tau, that I 'love' her. karena gw uda kenal dy, n seiring berjalannya waktu, feeling itu gag berubah. mungkin emg bner gw srg mengobral kata 'cinta', tp kali inii, gw mw bertanggung jwab bwt kata ituu.

kalau kata orang, cinta itu datang tiba2, ga ada yg tau kpn dy datang, yg skrg gw prtanyakan adalah, apakah pencuri itu datang jg d hatinyaa?

:'(

I really dunno what kind of story I should write in this posting.
It seems like that I'm being an anti social at the moment. I dunno what to say, if I meet new people, I don't really like to meet another people.
My days are getting darker,, and I missed the 'old me', who can laugh and can tell a lot of stories.
If life do is like roller coaster, maybe now I'm on the lowest point.
Cause, i've never felt so lonely like this before.
One of my best friend has gone, without any explanation, and then I have no girl now. There are a lot of bad things, which happened recently, but I wouldn't write them down here.
And it turns out that I'm too tired to search for girl of my dream., from now on, I'll just let it flow and not chase any girl.
Cause I got no power at all to chase another girl again.
I just wanna live my life.
Sorry if this posting is a boring piece of shit for some readers., but I just wanna spit my feeling out. I hope u understand
-fin-

so doof schafft kein mensch

judul di atas artinya 'ketololan yg seperti itu ga mgkn dilakukan oleh manusia'. di postingan kali inii gw mw curhat lagii.

ok, pertama2, gw mw ngasi tau, bahwa gw tu tw cwe itu kyk apa, gw tw apa yg mereka mw, gw tw gmn mendekati mereka, dll.

tapi yg tololnya, itu ilmu g bkal bisa kluar klo gw suka sma seorang wanita. knapaa?

soalnya, gw g bisa tu ngontrol diri gw sndiri klo gw uda suka ma cwe.

kalau gw g terlalu suka, gw malah bisa ngontrol tu feeling.

weird, isn't it?

padahal gw tw, klo gw buru2 blg suka sma cwe, pasti gw g bisa dptin tu cwe, tp ttp aja, gw g bs nahan diri gw sndiri

ach man, es ist aber sehr ärgerlich

jadi, karena itu gw jarang bgd bisa ngedapetin cwe yg bnr2 gw suka, krena itu jg gw g pernah awet klo pacaran

jadi buat cwe2 di luar sana, yg knal gw, klo lo bisa ngerasa gw sweet bgd sma lo, berhati-hatilah, karena mgkn ke dpnnya gw bakal cm bermain2 dgn hati kalian

sbenernya gw g mw nulis kyk ginian d blog gw, tp gw g tw mesti mencurahkan rahasia terbesar gw ini kmana lg.

I'm desperately messed up now, because of this dumb habit

I mean, I've lived for 20 years in this world, but I still couldn't get rid of this stupid things, which make me lose a lot of girls, who I knew, that I'd love her for sure

okay, it's always been so grey in this past two weeks.

there are several reasons for it,

firstly, I've bad notes in all my recent test, I've almost failed by all subjects.

moreover I couldn't manage my money well, till i have to work, even though I had so many essays to write last month.

And then I figured out that the girl, which I really like, will leave me. Well, I believed, that she got annoyed by my presence in internet.

Those reasons are enough to ruin everything in november

And tomorrow I've to do my final exam in math, and I've learned nothing till this moment, I dunno if I can meke it through, it's too late to start studying now.

I just can make a wish, that I'd be lucky enough to past this math exam

for u all, I hope that y'all are doing just well in this last month of 2010.

I'm signing out for now.

ciao